Does Your Child Have Celiac Disease?

Navigating the ups and downs of Celiac Disease can be difficult, but for Celiac kids, it comes with its unique set of challenges.

Does Your Child Have Celiac Disease? What's It Like In Their Shoes?

When you're a kid, you simply want to belong. This is especially important in childhood when kids are becoming integrated in peer groups. Being diagnosed with Celiac Disease as a child can make it hard to feel that vital sense of belonging and community.

Picture this: It's 3rd grade and a group of children are eating snacks at recess... One child is devouring his goldfish, another is eating her granola bar, and a third is having a piece of fruit.

Enter a 4th kid - the Celiac. While the other three are openly talking and eating away, the Celiac kid is slowly pulling out her gluten free snack, careful to not draw any extra attention to herself. Looking around for the all-clear of not being asked 'what are you eating?' she slowly begins to take a bite.

Just when she thought she would be free from any social distress, fruit kid asks goldfish kid for 1 or 2 goldfish. Goldfish kid gladly shares and the two start talking about how much they love goldfish. Oh how Celiac kid wishes they could have goldfish again!

Celiac kid starts going down memory lane to when they were in kindergarten and could eat goldfish, only to be rudely interrupted by goldfish kid asking for a piece of fruit from fruit kid. It turns out that goldfish kid loves apples.

Celiac kid thinks for a moment that perhaps she could ask for an apple too, since fruit is gluten-free- she's been taught. Yet, didn't fruit kid touch goldfish just a few moments prior? That would mean their hands have now been cross-contaminated.

Celiac kid wants nothing more than to partake in this jovial exchange of recess snacks, but now feels awkward and sad at not being able to share. Celiac kid then thinks they could share their snack at least with goldfish kid, fruit kid, and maybe even granola kid, but then quickly recoils at the thought of being made fun of.

She's heard it all too many times before "your snack tastes weird... eww gluten free is gross... I'm so happy I'm not gluten-free...." and the list goes on and on.

Now, reading this snack-sharing recess scene might make you sad and rightfully so. Because when it comes to having Celiac as a child, it isn't just about what you can and can't eat: It is about the social implications and the sense of belonging that Celiac kids often so deeply crave that can cause such anguish.

Scenes like the one above appear time and time again, not only at recess but at birthday parties where cake and cupcakes reign, family gatherings where relatives think they'll "grow out of it" and after sports game pizza dinners which Celiac kids may choose to forgo or timidly bring their own separate pizza, careful to protect it from flying crumbs and insensitive comments.

Does Your Child Have Celiac Disease? How Parents Can Help!

Celiac kids may feel they have to work extra hard to earn their spot in a social group, they might be bullied for being different, and they may retreat into themselves in order to protect themselves from feelings of sadness and isolation.

Fortunately, there are steps parents of Celiac children can take:

• For instance, you can join Celiac kids support groups in their area and set up playdates with other Celiac children. The joys of being able to eat food at another kids house will likely be great for your child even if at first they appear resistant to partake in these gatherings. Your Celiac child may either resist or welcome the idea of hanging out with other Celiac children. Either scenario is normal. However, through frequent exposure to other Celiac kids, over time, I believe that your child will feel less and less alone and will develop greater resiliency to navigating the challenges that come with a desire to belong.

• Another way you can help your child feel included is to make gluten-free the norm in your home. If your Celiac child sees their brother or sister eating pizza they can't have, of course they are going to feel sad! Kids want everything to be fair and equal. Anyone who has seen two siblings cut their share exactly in half so that neither of them got the bigger piece knows this. I would recommend limiting occurrences of non-gluten-free food being eaten in the house. Instead, you can have gluten-free pizza nights with your family where you even make a special gluten-free dessert as well. Once your child sees their parents and siblings enjoying-and I mean actually delighting in gluten-free food, I can assure you that they will feel a million times better about themselves and about having Celiac Disease.

• One more way parents can help their Celiac kids is to remind them of all the ways they are wonderful, just as they are. I would invite parents to encourage their Celiac child to not forget all the other identities they hold: the loving sibling, the advocate for animals, or the beautiful singer. Our identity isn't composed of only one thing, and having Celiac should not be the first thing your child identifies with. Reminding them of how valued they are to you and the world will instill a sense of confidence and community in your Celiac child.

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Book a call for your Celiac child- no strings attached. They can bring their favorite gluten-free snack. You two can share what they're most struggling with as a Celiac and see if I can help.

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